January 16, 2008
I have come back to Proverbs 3:5-6 over and over in the last several weeks. It reads: Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
A few weeks ago, I had another dream that Jeff was in. In the months after his passing, I used to have frequent dreams about him. This was the first one I can recall in nearly a year. I was out at the store, and he approached me on the sidewalk. Again, he looked as he used to before he got sick, and it was so good to see him full of energy. (He was even chewing gum, and I am not sure I ever saw him chew gum before!) No one else could see him, and he had returned just to give me a brief message. He told me that Heaven was worth it all and that one third of the things I thought about here would not matter once I got there. That was it.
I am not a person that believes that you can communicate with someone after they have passed. I have however, asked God to reach me in any way that I would hear Him, including dreams. I do not read into everything I see or hear or dream. But this one, as simple as it was, has just made me think. I believe that it would be realistic to say that in most of our lives, things that do not matter would consume more than one third of our thoughts. What did I do today that mattered in Heaven? It puts a new perspective on the day. Did I cause someone to stumble... did I cause myself to stumble? It is so easy to get caught up in the days we live in. Our paths are full of potholes and detours and even bad weather. If I could just figure out how to fully trust Him, and stop thinking about the things that do not matter, He promises to make my path straight. A straight path is so much easier to be on than a winding one. That is my prayer.
And by the way, I know that if Jeff could, he really would tell us that Heaven is worth it all.