April 30
I know it has been almost a month since my last entry. This in no way means that I have not been inspired by God on a daily basis. For the last year and a half of my life, things have been so different for me. As I have said before, I grew up in church. I learned how to pray as soon as I could talk. We even taught my very first dog, Benny, how to say prayers with us at night. He would lay across my stomach as my dad knelt beside my bed and we would say "Benny, say your prayers." and he would proceed to make grumbling noises. I was taught to have faith from a very early age. Yet, I had a very blessed childhood where I never really had to test that faith out. I have just recently come to realize what it is to seek God's desire for me and how to really read and interpret His word. It never ceases to amaze me that whenever I am in doubt, I open my Bible and I literally find very specific references to my daily dilemma. This is the most precious experience I could have. Sometimes it is hard to serve a God we cannot physically see or touch. However, I believe there have been many instances that spiritually, I have seen my Savior and I have felt His touch. He knows the desires of my heart, yet knows that I am human. He understands that as much as I try not to worry about life, that is sometimes easier said than done. He is there to listen to me talk things out and when I ask for guidance, he gives me His scripture.
Give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only my daily bread. Proverbs 30:8.
"I tell you the truth," Jesus replied, "no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children, and fields-and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first." Mark 10:29-31
Knowing what I know now, I would give up everything for the Gospel. I don't desire to be rich, I just want to make a difference. There is a song by Jeremy Camp that just came to my mind as I was writing. I will post the lyrics.
My Desire