November 28, 2006
Sometimes I go back through the pictures I have posted on the site of our family, and it's almost like I still have to do it to convince myself of the reality of everything that has taken place. I see everyone on the homepage, we're all healthy and together. Then I look at the pictures from September of this year, and the difference is... well... it's all different, but we still had the same smiles on our faces. That wasn't just for the camera, we have always been a very close family. It's just amazing how much can change in so little time. When Jeff first went into Hospice, one of the first things he asked was if they would allow him to put up a Christmas tree in the room when the time came. We have always had very traditional holidays at my mom and dad's house. I have to keep reminding myself that Jeff is not missing out on anything... he has it better than any of us. It is just so hard to grasp the reality of it all. On Thanksgiving day, I prayed more than once for anyone that had lost a member of their family, or a friend. They will always be missed, no matter how many years pass.
Our family is eagerly anticipating the birth of the newest member of our family. Jenn is due in two weeks, right on Jeff's birthday. I have talked about the lyrics to the song "Praise You in This Storm". Part of the song says, "and as Your mercy falls, I'll raise my hands, and praise the God who gives and takes away." And I know that even though Jeff has been taken from us, God is blessing us with a brand new life.
Romans 15:5-6 says: May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus.
Romans 16: 20 says: The God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet. The grace of our Lord Jesus be with you.
One thing I know is no matter how sad it can be sometimes to think of what we've lost, I do know that our gain will be even greater. God doesn't just promise that Satan will eventually leave us alone, but that he will be crushed under our feet. In order to do that, we have to stay upright and keep taking steps. I know that we are not the only ones who have experienced pain this year, so I pray for that spirit of unity, that we can glorify God together through it all.
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